Yo Joe! Or rather… Yo, Cobra-La? If you were a G.I. Joe fanatic cruising the video store aisles in the late 80s, spotting the feature-length G.I. Joe: The Movie on VHS felt like uncovering a secret mission briefing. This wasn't just another collection of episodes; this 1987 animated movie, helmed by TV animation veteran Don Jurwich (who oversaw much of the Sunbow G.I. Joe and Transformers output) and penned by Ron Friedman (also scribe for Transformers: The Movie), promised something bigger, bolder, and honestly, quite a bit stranger than the already action-packed TV series. And boy, did it deliver on the strange.
### Beyond the Broadcast Battles
Remember the feeling? Popping that tape in, the familiar fanfare hitting, but then… that incredibly epic, almost heavy metal-infused opening sequence? It immediately signaled higher stakes. The animation, while still distinctly 80s TV quality, felt grander, the battles more intense. We weren't just dealing with Cobra Commander's latest wacky scheme involving weather dominators or hypnotism; this story delved into ancient civilizations, bio-mechanical horrors, and the very origins of Cobra itself. It was ambitious, maybe even too ambitious for its own good, but that sheer audacity is part of its enduring charm. This was Hasbro and Sunbow Productions swinging for the fences, initially planning a theatrical run alongside Transformers: The Movie (1986) and My Little Pony: The Movie (1986). However, after those films didn't exactly set the box office ablaze, G.I. Joe: The Movie was rerouted straight to video and television, becoming a legendary find for dedicated fans rather than a summer blockbuster.
### Enter the Serpent Cult
The core plot throws the Joes – and viewers – a massive curveball with the introduction of Cobra-La, a hidden, ancient race of snake-like humanoids dwelling in the Himalayas. Led by the genuinely creepy Golobulus (voiced with chilling gravitas by Burgess Meredith, yes, the Penguin himself!), they reveal themselves as the true founders of Cobra. Suddenly, Cobra Commander, that screeching, wonderfully incompetent villain we all loved (voiced to perfection by the irreplaceable Chris Latta), is relegated to second fiddle, even facing mutation as punishment. It was… a lot. These weren't cartoon villains; Golobulus and his minions Pythona and Nemesis Enforcer felt genuinely menacing, plucked from a darker fantasy realm. Their organic technology and body-horror vibes were a stark contrast to Cobra's usual tanks and lasers. It certainly divided fans then, and likely still does, but you have to admire the creative leap, however bizarre.
### New Blood and Near Misses
The movie also served as a vehicle to introduce new characters, most notably Lt. Falcon. Voiced by none other than Miami Vice superstar Don Johnson, Falcon is positioned as Duke's irresponsible younger half-brother, needing a harsh lesson in duty. Johnson's casting felt like a major coup, lending some surprising star power to the project, even if Falcon himself often comes across as arrogant and needing a serious attitude adjustment. His arc forms a central pillar of the story, especially after the film's most infamous moment. (Mild Spoiler Warning for a 35+ year old movie!) Yes, we have to talk about Duke. In a shocking scene mirroring Optimus Prime's demise in Transformers: The Movie, Duke takes a snake spear to the chest saving Falcon. Originally, Duke was scripted to die. However, negative audience reactions to Prime's death led Hasbro to demand a last-minute change. The result? That slightly jarring, dubbed-in line over Duke's prone form: "He's gone into a coma!" It’s a fascinating piece of animation history, a testament to the power of fan reaction (and perhaps toy sales concerns) influencing storytelling right down to the wire.
### Voices of a Generation (and a Few Surprises)
Beyond Don Johnson's unexpected appearance, the voice cast is a who's who of 80s animation legends. Michael Bell brings his dependable heroism to Duke, while Chris Latta delivers another iconic performance as the increasingly pathetic (yet still hilarious) Cobra Commander. His defiant shrieks and cowardly retreats remain highlights. Hearing all these familiar voices from the show assembled for one big adventure was pure joy for young fans. The creation of Serpentor, Cobra's genetically engineered emperor introduced late in the TV series, is also central here. His quest for global domination using Cobra-La's technology drives much of the plot, providing a suitably over-the-top antagonist even before Golobulus steps from the shadows.
### Legacy in a Plastic Case
So, how does G.I. Joe: The Movie hold up? As a piece of pure 80s animated action, it’s a blast. The opening sequence alone is worth the price of admission (or rental fee, back in the day!). The introduction of Cobra-La remains a wild, imaginative swing, even if it feels tonally disconnected from the established G.I. Joe universe. The action is plentiful, the stakes feel genuinely high (coma notwithstanding), and hearing those iconic character voices never gets old. It’s undeniably a product of its time – the animation has that specific Sunbow look, and the plot takes some truly outlandish turns. But for fans who grew up with Duke, Scarlett, Snake Eyes, and the endless waves of Cobra troopers, this movie felt like a massive event, a culmination of everything we loved about the show, cranked up to eleven… with added snake people. It’s a vital piece of G.I. Joe lore and a fascinating artifact of Hasbro's ambitious, if ultimately short-lived, 80s cinematic universe attempt.
VHS Heaven Rating: 7/10
Justification: While the plot veers into glorious absurdity with Cobra-La and the infamous Duke 'coma' edit feels tacked on, G.I. Joe: The Movie delivers epic action, fantastic voice work (especially Chris Latta), and that iconic opening. It captures the high-stakes feel intended for a theatrical release and remains a must-watch for dedicated fans, even with its quirks. It's ambitious, memorable, and deeply rooted in the 80s animation scene we cherish.
Final Thought: It may not have conquered the box office, but G.I. Joe: The Movie certainly conquered our VCRs, proving that sometimes, the weirdest missions are the most memorable. Now you know… and knowing is half the battle!