Okay, fellow travelers down the magnetic tape highway, let's rewind to a time when sequels turning up on the small screen felt like finding buried treasure – sometimes valuable, sometimes... well, let's just say 'interesting'. Pop the cassette in, ignore that tracking line dancing at the bottom for a second, and let's talk about 1985's The Dirty Dozen: Next Mission.
Seeing this title flicker onto the screen back in the day? It was a jolt. The Dirty Dozen? The Lee Marvin back as Major Reisman? Almost twenty years after Robert Aldrich’s gritty 1967 masterpiece redefined the war movie? It seemed almost unbelievable, especially as a made-for-TV movie. Yet, there he was, silver-haired but still radiating that unique brand of weary authority, ready to whip another batch of military convicts into shape for a suicide run.
Another Suicide Squad, Same Cranky Boss
The premise hits familiar beats: Allied command needs an impossible job done – assassinating an influential Nazi General plotting to kill Hitler (a plot point that feels distinctly 80s in its execution). General Worden, once again played with reliable gusto by the great Ernest Borgnine, knows just the man to assemble the expendable crew: Major John Reisman. Of course, Marvin slips back into the role like a comfortable old trench coat, his minimalist style and gravelly delivery instantly grounding the proceedings. It’s a testament to his screen presence that even in this lower-budget television affair, he commands attention.
Joining Marvin and Borgnine is Richard Jaeckel as Sgt. Bowren, the only other returning cast member from the original twelve (plus staff). The absence of giants like Bronson, Cassavetes, or Sutherland is felt, naturally, but the new recruits bring their own flavour. Most notable is Ken Wahl, hot off his run in the cult classic show Wiseguy. He brings a different kind of rebellious energy as convict Louis Valentine, contrasting nicely with Marvin’s stoicism. The rest of the dozen fill the familiar archetypes – the strong silent type, the loose cannon, the reluctant participant – serviceably rounding out the squad for their perilous trek behind enemy lines.
Practical Mayhem on a TV Budget
Now, let's talk about the action, because that's where these 80s TV movies often delivered surprising bang for their buck. Directed by action veteran Andrew V. McLaglen – a man who knew his way around large casts and explosive set pieces thanks to films like The Wild Geese (1978) and countless John Wayne westerns – Next Mission doesn't skimp on the practical stuff. Remember how real those bullet hits looked back then? Squibs bursting with crimson enthusiasm, often strategically placed on conveniently located wooden crates or stone walls for maximum visual impact. That's the flavour here.
The climactic assault on the train carrying the target is pure, unadulterated 80s action filmmaking. We get genuine stunt performers taking tumbles, real (controlled) explosions rocking the frame, and plenty of machine-gun fire that feels satisfyingly physical. There's a sequence involving derailing the train that, while clearly achieved with miniatures and clever editing, possessed a weight and impact that digital effects sometimes struggle to replicate. It wasn't seamless, perhaps, viewed through modern eyes, but watching it on a fuzzy CRT, it felt dangerous. Retro Fun Fact: Much like many European-set war films of the era trying to stretch their budgets, large parts of Next Mission were actually filmed in Yugoslavia, providing authentic-looking locations without breaking the bank.
Accepting the Mission's Terms
Is it the original Dirty Dozen? Of course not. That film was lightning in a bottle – a cynical, brutal, star-studded affair that pushed boundaries. Next Mission, by contrast, feels very much like a product of its time: a mid-80s television event. The script, penned by Michael Kane, is more straightforward, the characters less morally ambiguous, and the overall tone less abrasive. It follows the formula reliably, hitting the expected training montages and mission briefing scenes.
But here's the thing: taken on its own terms, as a slice of 80s action nostalgia, it works. It’s undeniably cool seeing Lee Marvin back in the saddle, even if the mission feels a bit like a greatest hits compilation. Retro Fun Fact: Marvin was reportedly hesitant to return, feeling the original's legacy was complete, but the opportunity (and presumably, the paycheck) proved persuasive enough for this outing. Sadly, this would be his final appearance as Reisman; he passed away two years later, though the franchise bizarrely continued with two more TV sequels starring Telly Savalas (yes, Kojak himself!) as a different Major leading new dozens.
The film delivered exactly what it promised: a familiar face leading a new crew on a dangerous mission, packed with the kind of explosions and gunfire that made weekend television feel exciting. It wasn’t aiming for cinematic immortality; it was aiming to entertain viewers settling in for a night of action, and in that, it largely succeeded.
Rating: 6/10
Justification: While it can't hold a candle to the iconic original and suffers from the constraints of its TV movie budget and a more conventional script, The Dirty Dozen: Next Mission delivers solid 80s action comfort food. Lee Marvin's return elevates the material significantly, and the practical effects and stunt work, guided by the experienced hand of Andrew V. McLaglen, offer genuine retro thrills. It lacks the grit and depth of its predecessor, but earns points for effort, nostalgia, and giving us one last ride with Major Reisman.
Final Thought: It might not be the definitive Dozen experience, but for a taste of how action sequels got done for the small screen back when practical pyrotechnics were king, Next Mission is a perfectly enjoyable tour of duty down memory lane. Just don't expect the same body count... or the same budget.