Alright, pop that tape in, adjust the tracking if you need to (you probably need to), and settle in. Because tonight on VHS Heaven, we’re revisiting a genuine head-scratcher from the video store shelves, a film that combined the king of “no respect” with… girls’ soccer? Yes, it’s 1992’s Ladybugs, a Rodney Dangerfield vehicle that feels beamed directly from an alternate comedy dimension.
### From Iron Eagles to Ladybugs?
Let’s get one baffling, wonderful piece of trivia out of the way immediately. This slice of early 90s family-adjacent silliness was directed by Sidney J. Furie. Yes, the same Sidney J. Furie who gave us the gritty cool of The Ipcress File (1965) and the surprisingly intense aerial action of Iron Eagle (1986). Seeing his name on Ladybugs is like finding out Martin Scorsese directed an episode of Full House. It adds a layer of surreal charm before the opening credits even finish rolling. How did this happen? Who knows, but the juxtaposition is part of the fun.
### No Respect, No Goals
The setup is pure Dangerfield desperation. Chester Lee (Rodney Dangerfield, naturally) is a salesman trying to schmooze his way into a promotion. His boss casually mentions the company sponsors a girls' soccer team, the Pimmet Panthers, coached by a rival for the job. Seeing an opportunity, Chester lies about his soccer prowess (claiming he played goalie for the NASL's defunct Denver Dynamos – a lovely specific, forgotten detail) and angles to take over the worst team, the titular Ladybugs, hoping to impress by turning them around. The problem? They are spectacularly, hilariously awful.
Dangerfield is, well, Dangerfield. He wanders through the film dropping his trademark self-deprecating one-liners, looking perpetually uncomfortable in sportswear, and treating the whole affair with the bewildered exasperation that defined his comedic persona. He co-wrote the story, and you can feel his fingerprints all over Chester's dialogue. It’s not sophisticated, often relying on his established stage act transplanted onto a soccer field, but if you have any affection for Rodney’s schtick, there are genuine laughs here. It's like watching your slightly inappropriate uncle try to navigate a PTA meeting – awkward, maybe a little cringey, but undeniably memorable.
### The Elephant (or Rather, the Boy) in the Room
Chester’s brilliant plan involves recruiting talent. Specifically, Martha. Martha is agile, skilled, and the star player the Ladybugs desperately need. Martha is also Matthew (Jonathan Brandis), the athletically gifted son of Chester’s girlfriend Bess (Ilene Graff). Matthew has just been cut from his own soccer team and is heartbroken. Chester, in a move that screams “early 90s plot logic,” convinces Matthew to don a wig and join the Ladybugs as ‘Martha’ to salvage the season and Chester’s job prospects.
Let’s be honest, this central conceit hasn’t aged like fine wine. The cross-dressing humor, while played mostly for gentle laughs about locker room awkwardness and romantic complications (Matthew develops a crush on teammate Kimberly, played by Vinessa Shaw in an early role), feels decidedly like a product of its time. Yet, somehow, it mostly works within the film’s specific, slightly bizarre universe. Much of that credit goes to the late Jonathan Brandis. Fresh-faced and already showing the charisma that would make him a teen idol in shows like seaQuest DSV, Brandis throws himself into the role with surprising commitment, navigating both the physical comedy of the soccer scenes and the emotional turmoil of his character's predicament. He sells the absurdity better than he has any right to. Remember how convincing those quick changes seemed back then, even on a fuzzy rental tape?
### Sideline Support and Soccer Chaos
Rounding out the main adult cast is the ever-effervescent Jackée Harry as Julie, Chester's assistant at work who gets roped into being the assistant coach. Harry brings her signature energy and comic timing, acting as both a foil and reluctant accomplice to Chester's increasingly frantic schemes. She grounds some of the silliness, providing much-needed reactions to Rodney’s non-stop barrage of jokes and the escalating chaos.
And the soccer itself? Don't expect the slick, choreographed action of modern sports films. This is charmingly rudimentary stuff. Kids running around, occasionally connecting with the ball, lots of flailing – it feels authentic in its lack of polish. Filmed largely on location in and around Denver, Colorado, it has that slightly sun-bleached, real-world look common to comedies of the era. The focus isn't on complex plays; it's on the comedic potential of ineptitude, punctuated by Matthew/Martha's sudden bursts of actual skill. It’s the kind of physical comedy and on-field action that relied entirely on performers and editing, long before CGI could smooth over any rough edges. Did anyone else rewind the tape just to see some of those ridiculous goals again?
### A VHS Staple By Default?
Ladybugs wasn’t exactly a critical darling upon release, and its box office ($15 million against a reported $13 million budget) was modest. Yet, like so many comedies of the era, it found a comfortable second life on home video. It was exactly the kind of movie you’d grab at Blockbuster on a Friday night when the bigger hits were checked out. It promised familiar laughs from a comedy legend, a goofy premise, and maybe, just maybe, a heartwarming sports story underneath it all. It delivered… mostly.
The film even features Blake and Dylan Tuomy-Wilhoit, better known as Nicky and Alex Katsopolis from Full House, in small roles on the team – a fun little "Hey, it's those kids!" moment for 90s TV fans scanning the background. It's these little connections, the specific faces and feelings of the time, that make revisiting Ladybugs feel like opening a time capsule.
Rating: 6/10
Justification: Ladybugs earns its score through sheer nostalgic charm and the undeniable presence of Rodney Dangerfield doing his thing, even if the vehicle itself is rickety. Jonathan Brandis delivers a committed performance despite the awkward premise, and Jackée Harry adds welcome energy. The central plot is undeniably dated and requires a healthy dose of 90s perspective, and the direction feels functional rather than inspired (despite Furie's pedigree). However, for fans of Dangerfield or anyone who remembers renting this oddity, it offers genuine chuckles and a warm, fuzzy hit of early 90s goofball energy. It's far from a classic, but it's a memorable curio.
Final Thought: It’s clunky, the premise is pure 90s cheese, but watching Dangerfield try to coach soccer is a brand of comedic chaos they just don’t make anymore – thankfully, the VHS tapes still work.