Okay, rewind the tape. Remember those trips to the video store, scanning the comedy section past the usual Hollywood fare, and sometimes landing on something… different? Maybe a slightly worn box with a title you didn't recognize, often dubbed, promising European flair? Finding a gem like 1979's Velvet Hands (Mani di velluto) felt exactly like that – uncovering a charming, slightly goofy secret handshake from across the pond, usually discovered years after its initial release on a well-loved VHS.
This isn't your typical slam-bang 80s actioner, folks. Instead, settle in for a delightful slice of late 70s Italian romantic comedy, starring the absolute force of nature that was Adriano Celentano. If you only know Celentano from his music or maybe that viral clip of him singing gibberish meant to sound like American English ("Prisencolinensinainciusol"), you're missing out on his considerable cinematic charm. Here, he plays Guido Quiller, an engineer who made a fortune inventing a type of unbreakable display glass – the kind that’s ironically put small-time burglars out of business.
Rich Man, Poor Thief
The premise, courtesy of Celentano himself alongside veteran comedy writing/directing duo Castellano & Pipolo (who blessed Italian screens with dozens of hits), is pure classic screwball. After a messy separation leaves his assets frozen (thanks to his vengeful ex-wife), a series of slapstick misfortunes leads Guido to cross paths with the stunning pickpocket Fulvia, played by the effervescent Eleonora Giorgi. Mistaking the disheveled Guido for a fellow thief down on his luck, Fulvia and her eccentric family of small-time crooks take him under their wing. What’s a millionaire inventor to do? Why, pretend to be one of them, of course, especially since he’s instantly smitten with Fulvia.
The comedy flows beautifully from this central misunderstanding. Celentano, with his unique, almost elastic physicality and deadpan expressions, is brilliant as the refined engineer trying desperately to mimic the mannerisms of a petty criminal. Watching him fumble through pickpocketing lessons or try to explain away his sophisticated knowledge is genuinely funny. A little-known fact: Celentano wasn't just the star; he co-wrote the screenplay, injecting his own brand of quirky humor into Guido's character. His performance here snagged him the prestigious David di Donatello award (Italy's Oscar equivalent) for Best Actor.
Chemistry and Charm Over Car Chases
Forget practical effects explosions; the fireworks here are purely comedic and romantic. Eleonora Giorgi, who also won a David di Donatello for her role, is utterly captivating as Fulvia. She’s not just a pretty face; she’s got impeccable timing and holds her own against Celentano's larger-than-life persona. Their chemistry is palpable, driving the romantic heart of the film. You genuinely root for this mismatched pair, even as the lies pile higher and higher.
The supporting cast, particularly John Sharp as the ever-so-proper English butler trying to maintain decorum amidst the chaos, adds layers of gentle humor. Castellano & Pipolo direct with a light touch, letting the performances and the absurdity of the situations shine. They knew how to craft popular entertainment – Velvet Hands was a massive box office success in Italy, demonstrating their knack for hitting the comedic sweet spot for audiences. The film has that distinctly bright, slightly saturated look common in late 70s European cinema, capturing the fashion and feel of Milan at the time with an optimistic sheen. The score is catchy, perfectly complementing the film's breezy tone.
A Different Kind of Retro Gold
Sure, some elements feel distinctly of their time. The plot isn't exactly unpredictable, and the gender dynamics occasionally reflect late 70s sensibilities. But viewed through the warm, fuzzy filter of nostalgia – perhaps on a screen that isn't pixel-perfect HD – the film’s charm is undeniable. It’s a comfort food movie, the kind you’d happily stumble upon late one night, maybe catching the dubbed version on some obscure channel or, better yet, pulling that familiar tape off the shelf.
This wasn't a film trying to break new ground; it was aiming squarely for laughs and heart, and it succeeded beautifully. It reminds us of a time when European comedies often found their way into North American video stores, offering a different flavor of humor – less reliant on gross-out gags, more focused on situational absurdity, character quirks, and romantic entanglement.
Rating: 8/10
Velvet Hands earns its score through sheer charisma, genuinely funny performances (especially from the perfectly paired Celentano and Giorgi), and a classic screwball premise executed with infectious energy. It might not have the high-octane thrills some crave, but its warmth and wit are undeniable.
Final Thought: Forget the explosions; sometimes the most satisfying retro finds are the ones wrapped in the smooth, funny charm of Italian screen magic, like slipping on a pair of... well, you know. A delightful discovery then, and still a genuinely enjoyable watch now.